David Beck-vom

Pot and kettle time in the increasingly yawnsome Sun, as it slams its German equivalent, the red-top rag Bild, for laying into David Beckham for his on-pitch puking antics against Ecuador.

Just cop a load of this for needlessly emotive language: "Sick," gasps the Sun and then weeps: "German rag hurls vile new taunts at poorly hero Becks."

The Sun's man in Baden-Baden goes on to blast - dread word - Bild for its latest "stomach-churning attack".

And evil Bild scribes (!) "sniped" at the great vomming man that perhaps he was sick because he was thinking of his wife's credit card bill.

A good joke, too. What rubbish about the Germans not having a sense of humour.

Message to the sniffy high-horse hacks of Wapping: it's all a, erm, gag, fellas.

Get. Over. Your. Selves.