This style's still big in Bonn

German cops' clip off

Excessive use of denim jackets, mullets, David Hasselhoff – at least one element of German popular culture will be under attempted wraps for the World Cup, as the Government tells their police officers to get short-back-and-sides.

Yes, the Vokuhila (short in front, long in back) will be having a close encounter with some clippers before kick-off, as well as a host of other style crimes.

Three-day beards, excessive jewellery and visible tats all have to be binned – a telling example of Miami Vice's lasting influence.

That's according to a spokeswoman from the German Interior Ministry – who mentioned that the grooming order also targeted "so-called Lagerfeld ponytails".

Apparently fashion designer Karl is something of an icon to the German rozzers. Ooh er.

Reports that undercover cops favour skintight jeans, boots and a crisp white shirt finished off with a natty black blazer and shades like their guru Lagerfeld are currently unconfirmed.

Thankfully for expressionist German coppers the crackdown doesn't extend to makeup.

It's allowed as long as it's "socially appropriate for a policeman or policewoman".

So, unless you've paid for the pleasure, don't get into any aggro this summer with men wearing eyeliner and waving a large truncheon.

Now, where are those Hasselhoff tickets?